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Yzarc
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Dear Hakado:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but you're kind of a faggot. I think I realized it when I accidentally walked in on you in your room and I saw you fingering your own asshole with a fork. I'm sure you're man enough to understand that I'm extremely homophobic. I'm returning that sex tape we made together to you, but I'll keep the nude photos as a memory. You should also know that I fucked your mom hard.

Hope we can still be friends, but not really,
Yzarc






Dear Hakado:

I don't really know how to tell you this, but the mafia wants you. I think I realized it when I tripped on sesame seeds at the mental hospital and I saw you carve your initials into my Kid Rock-collection. I'm sure you're man enough to understand that I'm allergic to your hamster. I'm returning your ring to you, but I'll keep the oil stocks as a memory. You should also know that I never will forget the incarnation as an eskimo .

Go and drown yourself,
Yzarc
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