Football Funnies

We hope you enjoy your visit.

You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.

Join our community!

If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Football Funnies
Topic Started: Jan 15 2008, 04:17 PM (89 Views)
Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 04:17 PM Post #1
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	Quotes of the week By Chris Charles Carlos Tevez Where do you think I keep it, dummy? "I don't know where Carlos keeps the dummy. He produces it from nowhere." Manchester United midfielder Michael Carrick on Carlos Tevez's mysterious goal celebration prop. Are you going to tell him, or shall I? "I am sure we will see pictures of Sam in his Speedos walking along a beach somewhere. That won't be a pretty sight." Wigan manager Steve Bruce speculates on where Big Sam will pop up next....no-one wants to see that. "Once Ashley puts some weight on he will be fantastic. At the moment he's about three-and-a-half stone - a couple of times we have put him through the letterbox!" Aston Villa boss Martin O'Neill on what Ashley Young needs to keep on delivering. "When Kevin first came to the club he asked to be called 'SuperKev'. To be honest we thought he must be a bit of a k*-head, but now we know why." West Brom skipper Jonathan Greening is delighted Kevin Phillips is putting the willies up opposition defenders. "Sometimes he has breakfast with the staff and asks a million questions. He doesn't get a million answers but Wayne is refreshing." Sir Alex Ferguson has a million reasons to love Wayne Rooney. "It was very nice to enter the locker room. There was a good feeling in there, and I got a good feeling from Kevin Doyle and Stephen Hunt." Reading new boy Marek Matejovsky is touched by his special welcome. "It's Test cricket, not tiddlywinks." Cricket Australia chief executive James Sutherland defends his country's on-field behaviour in the wake of the 'Bollyline' row. "He has played for nearly every club in the world. It is absolutely amazing how much money he's moved for. He is, himself, a bank!" Arsenal boss Arsene Wenger on his former player, walking cash machine Nicolas Anelka, following his move to Chelsea. Matt Lucas as Dafydd in Little Britain I used to play left-back for Arsenal you know "You probably think I'm Kenny Sansom!" Little Britain star Matt Lucas on meeting Wenger after the Frenchman admitted he had never seen the show. "We very quickly found out that Luton Town Football Club did not do what it said on the tin." Hatters manager Kevin Blackwell announces he will be leaving the cash-strapped club after they failed to get his Ronseal of approval. "I need to win a few tournaments because nappies can cost a bit." New dad Ken Doherty is hoping it's nappy days at snooker's Masters. AND SOME FROM YOU "I don't want to comment on who or what will take over my job at Newcastle." Sam Allardyce after getting sacked. (Tom Leonard, Britain). "If you want a quiet life you turn a blind ear." Geoffrey Boycott on umpires allowing the Aussies to sledge. (Chris Knight, England). "You know he's going to win a lot of the headers... You have to be aware of that, wait for the shout and watch him get his big head on the ball." Villa's Curtis Davies pays free-scoring Martin Laursen a compliment, sort of. (Ross, Ireland). "He got sent off after half an hour for performing a tracheotomy on the field. I knew straight away, he was good enough for me." Former Brentford boss Martin Allen tells BBC 5 Live's Monday Night Club how he signed Sam Sodje for the Bees. (Frank, London). Ruud van Nistelrooy Great goal, so why the long face? "And thats a Gigabyte of skill in a nanosecond from old horsey-face!" Commentator on Gol TV, after Ruud Van Nistelrooy scores for Real Madrid against Levante. Classic! (Ben Johnson, USA and Kailyn, USA). "Over the years whilst fielding at first slip, Dravid almost seems to have developed an ability to stick Kumble's balls to his hands." ABC cricket commentator during Australia-India series. (Sean, Sydney). "Today I'm joined by Paul Walsh who won the Cup with Spurs in 1991, Phil Thompson who won it in 1974, Paul Merson who won it in 1993 and Matt Le Tissier. What are you doing here?" Jeff Stelling introduces the pundits on Soccer Saturday during FA Cup third round weekend. (Richard White, Cornwall). "I am very happy because I signed this morning and for my head that is fantastic." Laurent Robert on signing for Derby. Are they only employing his head? (Mark Hughes, England). "Dutch people generally are loyal, disciplined and straight to the point." Ryan Babel when asked in the Liverpool match programme 'How would you define Dutch people in THREE WORDS?' (Chris Fletcher, England). "Who'd've thought that after the first half we'd've had a second half?" Sky Sports commentator during the Saracens-Biarritz Heineken Cup fixture - well most of us would've thought that to be fair! (Paddy Murphy, UK). Jon Parkin Parkin takes the ribbing on the chins "Parkin's making a run towards the box, he might get there sometime this week." Commentary from Jonathan Pearce during the Stoke v Newcastle Game. (Gary Turner, Bristol). "Do you think you should have been ahead by more when they equalised?" Sky reporter to Ledley King after the League Cup semi-final draw with Arsenal. (Josh Finlay, England). "Theo Walcott raced through to halt the celebrations with a goal so larcenous it should have been shown on Crimewatch, not Sky Sports." From the Telegraph after Theo Walcott's late equaliser denied Tottenham victory in the above match. (Kenny Lomas, England). "A memorable half hour to forget!" Sky's Alan Mclnally can't make up his mind whether he likes the game he's watching or not. (Paynio, UK). "They are fourth in the Championship, and you can't ask for more than that." Mark Bright on Stoke's achievements this season. (Tim Wood, Bristol). "That tackle was a leg-breaker. Fortunately, he didn't break his leg." Lee Dixon on MOTD. (David, England). "This year so far I've had my girlfriend dump me, my work cut my hours so much I need a new job, I'm Ł14k in debt and to compound my misery, Spurs are beating my beloved Arsenal. Roll on 2009!" Paul from a very cold Emirates Stadium, via text on 81111 - (One can only hope things get better, Paul!) (Ernest Goodheart, Ireland). CHANTS OF THE WEEK "We've got more steel than you!" QPR fans at Bramall lane, referring to new investment by steel magnate Lakshmi Mittal at Rangers and Sheffield's status as the steel city. (Paul Knapp, England). Tom Hanks I'd rather be at the Villa "Forest Gump is a Villa Fan!" Aston Villa fans at Reading game after Hollywood actor Tom Hanks outed himself as a Villan. (Nick McD, England). "We couldn't sell you on ebay!" Grimsby Town fans to ex-keeper Anthony Williams. (Leon Harding, Grimsby). "Sali-Salifou... Sali-Salifou" (To the tune of Daddy, Daddy Cool). Villa fans pay tribute to Salifou on his debut. (RC, UK). "You're just a fat Kevin Doyle!" Reading fans to Robbie Keane at White Hart Lane.(Helen, Reading). "You'll never play at Anfield!" Bishop's Stortford fans to Havant and Waterlooville when Stortford were 4-1 up. Havant could face Liverpool in the FA Cup if they win their replay against Swansea. (Ben Markham, Bishop's Stortford). "We can't see you sneaking out!" Worcester City fans celebrate their abandonment at Nuneaton Borough when the floodlights failed with Nuneaton 2-0 up in the 82nd minute. (Darrell Butler, Worcestershire). "He's so lower league He's so lower league He's so lower league HE'S SO LOWER LEAGUE!" To the tune of 'She's so lovely' by Scouting For Girls - Burnley fans to their under-performing winger Steve Jones. (Abduly, UK) STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENT OF THE WEEK** "If this is your first visit to The Valley, I should probably advise you it's not always like that!" Charlton's announcer at half-time v Blackpool after four goals in a blistering first 25 minutes. (Paulo, England). "We wanted him, he wanted us, and now we're together." The stadium announcer at Stamford Bridge gets emotional over new signing Nicolas Anelka. (Emily, UK). "The next match here at the Banks's Stadium is on New Years Day, which this year falls on January 1st." Walsall stadium announcer at half-time in their league match with Millwall. (Adam Guest, United Kingdom). A little old, but well worth bending the rules to include it! Ed.



zarita	Jan 15 2008, 04:28 PM Post #2
Member Posts: 1,439 Group: Members Member #50 Joined: August 22, 2007	He's fat, He's round, He's sold your f**king ground, Al Fayed, Al Fayed... Most away fans V Fulham. :laughter To the tune of Tis the Season to be Jolly David Beckham walks on water, everybody knows that dogshit floats to the tune of you are my sunshine You wear a g-string, Posh Spice's g-string, you make us wonder, what sex you are, oh David Beckham, you are a strange one, but does you g-string match your bra? :laughter



Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 04:35 PM Post #3
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	:laugh3 :laugh3 :laugh3



Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 04:40 PM Post #4
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	"Two Andy Gorams, there's only two andy gorams"... Celtic fans to Andy Goram after its revealed the chubby keeper was diagnosed with Schizophrenia. ************************************* "Wheres your real dad, wheres your real dad!?" Charlton fans to Shaun Wright-Philips *********************************** Toon fans to JF Hasselbaink. He even laughed!: "You're just a fat Eddie Murphy" *********************************** (To the tune of Craig David - Rewind): "VAN PER-SIE, WHEN A GIRL SAYS NO - MOLEST HER" *********************************** To Graham Rix when he was released from prison after being convicted for, well, you know... (To the Manic Street Preachers song): "If you tolerate RIX, then your children will be next" ************************************ West brom sang: the premier league is upside down the premier league is upside down we'r up the top chelsea bottom the premier league is upside down then a few seconds later champions...............champions.............champions *********************************** He's here, he's there We're not allowed to swear Frank Leboeuf, Frank Leboeuf" Chelsea fans after Leboeuf said in a radio interview that he didn't like the idea of a swear word in his song. ************************************ A song about Tim Howard's tourettes syndrome..... in style of Chim-Chiminey "Tim timminy Tim timminy Tim Tim Tirooo We've got Tim Howard and he says FCK YOU!! ************************************ In reference to Jaime Carragher's dad being banned from football stadia after being arrested for being drunk at a football match.. He's red, He's sound, He's banned from every ground, Carra's dad, Carra's dad *********************************** Sung by Birmingham fans after Heskey started banging in the goals at St Andrews... Theres only one Emile Heskey, one Emile Heskey, He used to be she, But now hes alright, Walking in a Heskey wonderland *************************************** Here's a beauty sung at Highbury when Cygan is drafted in as emergency cover... He's bald, He's sht, He gets a game when no-one's fit, Pascal Cygan! Pascal Cygan! ************************************ To the tune of Rebel Rebel Neville Neville, you play in defence, Neville Neville, your play is immense, Neville Neville, like Jacko you're bad, Neville Neville is the name of your dad ************************************ Don't blame it on the Biscan, Don't blame it on the Hamann, Don't blame it on the Finnan, Blame it on Traore, He just can't, He just can't, He just can't control his feet. ************************************* . Do Do Do Pascal Chimbonda Do Do Do Pascal Chimbonda Do Do Do Pascal Chimbonda ************************************** Park Park wherever you may be You eat dogs in your home country It could be worse You could be scouse They eat rats in there council house *************************************** . He's big He's red His Feet stick out the Bed Its Peter Crouch, Its Peter Crouch :laughter :laughter



Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 04:56 PM Post #5
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	This one cracked me up :lol: Lovable Leeds (nominated by Steven Knowles) To the tune of 'She'll be coming round the mountain'... 'We're the best behaved supporters in the land, We're the best behaved supporters in the land, We're the best behaved supporters, best behaved supporters Best behaved supporters in the land (WHEN WE WIN!)' Pause.. 'We're a right set of b*ards when we lose, We're a right set of bards when we lose, We're a right set of b*ards, right set of bstards Right set of b***ards when we lose...'



Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 04:59 PM Post #6
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	That's Zamora (nominated by Colin Dyer) 'When you're sat in Row Z, and the ball hits your head...that's Zamora!' Sign On (nominated by Richard Bishop) Sung to Liverpool fans to the tume of 'You'll Never Walk Alone' by the opposition... 'Sign on, sign on, With a pen in your hand, Cause you'll never get a job...' You Are My Solskjaer (nominated by Tony Crane) 'You are my Solskjaer, my Ole Solskjaer, You make me happy, when skies are grey, And Alan Shearer, was f**king dearer, oh please don’t take my Solskjaer away...' Stand Up: An Alternative (nominated by Jamie Pover) Manchester City fans were told this year that they could not stand up when we travelled to Middlesbrough, hence the following song... 'Stand up, cos they said sit down, Stand up, cos they said sit down.' Heskey Wonderland (nominated by Marc S Duffy) 'There's only one...Emile Heskey, One...Emile Heskey, He used to be shite, but now he's alright, Walking in a Heskey wonderland.' Ode To The Roonster (nominated by Graeme Souter) 'He can only score in a brothel, Score in a brothel...'



Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 05:08 PM Post #7
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	To Liverpool or Everton You are a Scouser, An ugly Scouser, You're only happy, On Giro day. Your mum's out thieving, Your dad's drug-dealing, So please don't take my hubcaps away. :laughter :laughter



Ninja Boi	Jan 15 2008, 05:13 PM Post #8
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	(tune: If Your Happy N U Know It Clap Ya Hands ) (Sang when we play against West Ham) u can stick ya f*in' bubbles up ya arse u can stick ya fin' bubbles up ya arse u can stick ya fin' bubbles,stick ya fin' bubbles stick ya f**in' bubbles up ya arse!



Wolverine	Jan 16 2008, 02:55 PM Post #9
Dangerous when provoked Posts: 4,695 Group: Admin Member #2 Joined: August 17, 2007	There are some very amusing tunes out there :clap Did you know that Villa is now being called The Villains by other supporters ? Not very nice I feel



Ninja Boi	Jan 16 2008, 03:28 PM Post #10
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	That is our nickname wolvey, the villains... :lol: Its been that way since the year dot.



Wolverine	Jan 16 2008, 03:31 PM Post #11
Dangerous when provoked Posts: 4,695 Group: Admin Member #2 Joined: August 17, 2007	Ahhh see it never was amongst the West Ham lot, always The Villa. Goes to show you learn something new every day :lol:



Born to Rune	Jan 16 2008, 04:45 PM Post #12
I love Bread - we knead the dough...... Posts: 1,948 Group: Admin Member #1 Joined: August 16, 2007	Tsk -Get it right - It is actually Villans! Without the second i.



Ninja Boi	Jan 21 2008, 04:12 PM Post #13
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	If football teams were women Read this selection of Premiership teams and the women they are most like. Plus an extra one for a team that used grace our top league. Read on… Arsenal - Angelina Jolie Looks good, a bit maverick at times and you know they have the potential to really screw you over Aston Villa - Dido One big hit. Fairly inoffensive really Birmingham City - Mariah Carey Occasionally interesting, frequently annoying. Supporters are thick Blackburn Rovers - Melanie Sykes Common as muck Lancy, constantly worrying. Bolton Wanderers - Natalie Imbruglia Always looks like she might go down but never does Charlton Athletic - Martine McCutcheon Chirpy Cockney with the ability to spring a few surprises Chelsea - Rachel Stevens Every bit looks good from all angles. But what is she doing with that prick Everton - Barbara Windsor Been laughing at those tts so long we forget that once upon a time they actually looked quite good Fulham - Andrea Corr Not bad to look at but not much of her. Seems a bit awestruck with fame Leicester City - Patsy Palmer Generally a bit crap and second rate really, but some people like her Leeds United - Lisa Scott Lee Dirty Lee Liverpool - Sophie Ellis Bextor Individually all the components look fantastic - just doesn’t work when put together. Man City - Madonna Have been big at times - now lost the plot a bit - ageing stars. Nice new home though Man United - Jordan Dominated by tts. Screwed by Dwight Yorke. Quite repulsive really Middlesborough - Tara Palmer Tompkinson Can look quite good at the back - but nothing at all up front to speak of. Newcastle United - Christina Aguillera Can look good. Various unsavoury elements though. Portsmouth - Chrissie Hynde On the face of it a has-been but you’re quite interested in what she’s going to do next Southampton - Kylie Minogue Sometimes you feel sorry for them, they’re not huge and you’ve got a bit of a soft spot. Tottenham - Joan Collins Used to look good, but living on past glories. Additional one more… West Ham - Britney Spears Been threatening to go down for the last few years, but finally did it this year.



Ninja Boi	Feb 12 2008, 01:22 PM Post #14
The Lego Master Posts: 5,686 Group: Admin Member #3 Joined: August 17, 2007	Quotes of the week By Chris Charles Roy Keane You think this is angry? Wait 'til I've had a trim "I think the haircut helps. Having my hair cut used to help me. I used to feel leaner and sharper. Meaner. So I might shave mine next month." Sunderland boss Roy Keane after newly-shorn keeper Craig Gordon pulled off a series of fine shaves against Wigan. "I'm not saying whether I'm wearing them, but I hope I don't get knocked down by a bus on the way home!" Bristol City manager Gary Johnson dedicates the victory over Sheffield Wednesday to the pair of lucky pants his mum bought him. "The bottom line is Steven Gerrard doesn't need to be England captain, but you get an extra 10% from JT if he's in charge. I'm not saying John is less of a player when he's not captain..." Former England boss Steve McClaren gets himself in a tizzy after backing 'JT' for the national team captaincy. "I'm sure he'll have a headache because I hit him with shots where his face was changing shape but he was still standing there." Amir Khan on rearranging the face of Gary St Clair. "I am not a Messiah." Fabio Capello realises he can't compete with Kevin Keegan. "A lot of people have aches and pains - I had one or two before I got there!" Munich air crash survivor Harry Gregg produces a lighter moment at the service to mark the 50th anniversary of the disaster. "The only feedback I've had off the chairman is him asking me 'Do you want a pie?'" Steve Bruce insists the chips aren't down at Wigan. "He didn't play in any of the six away games in the last qualifying group. We have asked him if he could manage a few this time around, we would appreciate it! Now we have got three away friendlies on the run, and the bookies in Cardiff have offered me 11-1 that he won't be in any of them." Wales manager John Toshack wants Jason Koumas to start playing away. "It seems as if the Premier League is more interested in going on holiday at the moment and sunning themselves in Los Angeles or Japan." Brentford manager Andy Scott will take action on goal-line technology over a worldwide Premier League any day of the week. "This is the night 'The Executioner' gets executed." Joe Calzaghe promises to inflict some capital punishment on Bernard Hopkins. AND SOME FROM YOU "As I sit here with a couple of world class hookers..." Gaby Logan after the France-Ireland rugby match. (She was referring to co-commentators Wood and Ibanez.) (Aaron, England). "It was good just to see them train, get a feel of them." New Scotland boss George Burley gets to know his squad a bit better. (Jolyon Edwards, UK). ''It certainly sounds like he's in Buenos Aires.'' 5 Live commentator after speaking to a Davis Cup reporter. (Marcus Jackson, England). "He swivels his hips like Marilyn Monroe!" GolTV's Ray Hudson on Royston Drenthe, during Real Madrid's 7-0 walloping of Real Betis. (Senora Kati, USA). "A spirited performance where we ran out winners by one goat to nil." From Dagenham website after performance against Wycombe. Goat?! (Jamey Barron, Liverpool). "You always lose when your opponents score and you don't." Words of wisdom from France coach Raymond Domenech after losing 1-0 to Spain. (Julian, England). "Ghana are finding it difficult to impregnate the Cameroon defence." Eurosport commentator during the Ghana-Cameroon Africa Cup of Nations semi-final. I think he meant 'penetrate'! (Edd, England). "The middle stump is having a sideways look on life." David Lloyd's response after a Kiwi batsman was bowled in the second Twenty20 v England. (Simon Kendall, Cornwall). "I can't have a burger without putting on half a stone." John Hartson commenting on his struggle to keep fit. (Lisa B, UK). He retired shortly afterwards. Ed. "Sunderland have started like a house on fire!" Chris Kamara, Soccer Saturday. (Miller, England). "If it's going to go wrong I want it to go wrong the way I want it to." Falkirk manager John Hughes gets it all wrong. (Brendan, Glasgow). 'Brilliant' character in The Fast Show Yellow coats? Brilliant! "I don't know if he had a childhood trauma involving a man in a flourescent yellow coat." Eurosport's Gary Imlach suggests reasons for Cameroon defender André Bikey's insane sending off after pushing a medical worker at the Africa Cup of Nations. (Phil, England). "Matt Taylor is off - and what a chance he had. Two chances - three in fact, actually, if you count the third." Gary Weaver commentating on the Bolton-Portsmouth game as Matt Taylor goes off. (Paul Collier, USA). "Boumas scored Villa's first in the 48th minute then, just three months later, Carew scored his first of the game." Channel 7 reporter on the marathon Aston Villa-Newcastle game. (Ruairidh Calderwood, Australia). "Mark McGhee had the right word for the conditions - 'not adept'." Setanta Sports' Craig Burley after the Motherwell-Celtic game was called off.(Brian Duncan, Scotland). "Steven Reid's knee has blown up, so we've sent him back to Blackburn." Ray Houghton on Talksport - must have been an explosive tackle. (Cocknio DiCanio, England). "We didn't treat them like some Greek myth. There was no Godzilla out there.'' David Tyree of the New York Giants after beating New England Patriots in the Superbowl. So Godzilla is part of Greek mythology, then? (Carsten Adamsen, Denmark). "Dwight Yorke has come off - and the only man who could replace him...was the son of a Prica man." Sky Sports' Jeff Stelling on Sunderland substitute Rade Prica. (John, Scotland). "Lewis Moody leaps in the air like the salmon that he is." Matt Dawson commentating on England v Wales in the Six Nations. (Phil Langley, UK). "I'm not that bloke Mystic Meg." Rio Ferdinand gets the sex of his astrologers muddled up while being asked what impact Fabio Capello will have on the England team, according to the Daily Mail. (Lee, England). "Derby are toothless in attack, there's no way they'll score." Phil Thompson on Soccer Saturday watching Birmingham v Derby. Derby equalised just as he finished his sentence. (Jonathan Wood, England). "I've got more points on my licence - I'm not joking!" Derby manager Paul Jewell on his side's meagre points total. (Chris, England). "Believe you me, if that ball had gone in the net, it would have been a goal." Willie Miller (Aberdeen Director of Football) commentating on the Dundee United-Hibs game for Radio Scotland. (Kevin McCann, Edinburgh). THE MOTTY AND LAWRO SHOW Lawro: "Who votes for these things?" Motty: "I think it's done, as they say, online." Lawro: "Geeks!" BBC commentary team discussing Steven Gerrard being voted fans' player of the year. (Anthony Burdett, England). "And Wayne Brown brings the ball down." Motty gets mixed up during the England-Switzerland match. Wayne Brown? (Charles McAndrew, England). "You could say it would have been David Beckham's night, had he been here." Motty on Becks.(Jan, England). "Senderos is multi-lingual, which means he can say 'ouch' in five different languages." Lawro after Phillippe Senderos took a knock during the game. (Kenny Lomas, England). "Crouch on the right and Wright-Phillips on the left coming on now for England." Thanks, Motty - they're two players I often get confused!(Ian Dunnett, England). "Now it's time to find out if Capello likes playing with a big centre forward." Motty again. (Richard Beckett, England). CHANTS OF THE WEEK "Jim Bullard, Bullard, He's better than Steve Gerrard, He's thinner than Frank Lampard, Jim Bullard, Bullard." Fulham fans salute Jimmy Bullard. (Chaz Whelton, England). "Shanghai on Tuesday Nights!" Bristol City fans give their thoughts on being promoted to the Premier League during the defeat of Sheffield Wednesday. (Gary Turner, Bristol). "Who's the w*** with the drum?" Sheffield United fans against Colchester. "Sam's the w* with the drum!" Colchester fans reply. (Greg, England). "We are impeccable!" Man City fans at Old Trafford after the stadium announcer thanked them for their impeccable behaviour during the minute's silence. (Kevin, Scotland). "Time for your sandwiches!" City fans to their United counterparts 10 minutes before half-time as some started to leave their seats. (Paul Edwards, England). "I'd rather be a sausage than an egg!" Sung by Birmingham fans at recent away games. (Jordan Robinson, England). What?! Ed. "Our ginge is better than your ginge!" Bolton supporters against Portsmouth, referring to Gary Megson and Harry Redknapp. (Jack Hobson, England). "Don't blame it on Staunton, don't blame it on Givens, don't blame it on Keano, blame it on Delaney." Irish chant to chief executive John Delaney during the Brazil game, regarding the chaos surrounding the vacant manager's post. (Pádraig Ó Muireagáin, Ireland). "Just one Capello, give him to me, delicious manager, from Italy!" England fans v Switzerland. (Leon, UK). "You should stick to rugby league!" Plymouth Argyle fans to Hull. (Chris, Cornwall). "Return of the Mac!" Leeds fans welcome home Gary McCallister. "Dennis Wise, he's a k, he left the Leeds for an admin job!" And bid farewell to Dennis Wise.(Peter Smithson, UK). "He's bald, he's old, he never plays in goal - Jens Lehmann, Jens Lehmann." Man City fans to Lehmann.(Ste Wadsworth, England). STADIUM ANNOUNCEMENTS OF THE WEEK* "Please stand for the national anthem of the Republic of Northern Ireland." The MC at St Mary's before the start of the England U21 international with the Republic of Ireland. (Steve Hickman, England). "Please ignore the scoreboard, it is a bit out." Heard at the Wales-Scotland match.(Gareth Hubback, Wales). BANNERS OF THE WEEK "Commit all your crimes when Sachin is batting. They will go unnoticed because even the Lord is watching." Tribute to Sachin Tendulkar at the SCG. (Siddharth, India). "Shaun Pollock: Giving ginger kids cred since 1995." At 5th ODI between West Indies and South Africa. (Max Forrester, USA).



1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)


« Previous Topic · The Sports Dom (e) · Next Topic »