Viewing Single Post From: Some Kind Of Miracle

Viewing Single Post From: Some Kind Of Miracle
savvy32500	Feb 1 2007, 09:15 AM
McKiller Posts: 43 Group: .Grey Girls. Member #14 Joined: October 25, 2006	SOME KIND OF MIRACLE Meredith was still there, wearing the look of sheer exhaustion and shock on her face. She hadn’t spoken to anybody since the news report blasted across the television screen in the pit, “ RENOWNED NEUROSURGEON DR. DEREK SHEPHERD PRESUMED DEAD IN FERRYBOAT BLAST.” When she first heard it, she shook her head as if to will it away, but in that moment it all became a crushing reality as Dr. Mark Sloane walked into the pit with a look of loss so pronounced that it took her breath away. She quietly stood up, put the sutures down and without so much as a word to the patient she was stitching, Meredith walked off, to the only place she could think to go--- the attending locker room. It was there that she sat, with Derek’s locker open--- his sweater, the one he had worn into work that fateful morning, held lovingly against her chest, her face buried deep within its thread. She was breathing in the scent of the man who had captured her heart and captivated her soul for the last year of her life. The man who had loved her more than any other ---the one who had broken her so completely, but then came back much to her surprise, to heal the wounds he himself had inflicted on them both. He wasn’t perfect, far from it, but he was hers in every way that mattered. And she loved him. From the moment she had laid eyes on him, she was done. And now--- Meredith sat trying to process the words that had made her world stop cold---- Dr. Derek Shepherd, presumed dead. Derek, DEAD. As Mark and Addison mournfully entered the locker room, Meredith inhaled deeply--- giving into a wave of grief that could no longer be held at bay. Her shoulders began to shake, Mark kneeled down and joined her --- took her into his arms succumbing to his own wave of grief. Addison, who had stood back at the door, slowly approached both of them and cautiously laid a hand on Meredith’s shoulder---it was the only way she knew how to show her support and to allow herself to grieve the loss of the man she had been married to for over eleven years. This weird moment was not lost to Meredith, she knew just how awkward this twisted scene must have been for Addison Forbes Montgomery, formerly Shepherd. Her sobs softly relented as she reached up and took hold of Addison’s hand. They stayed like that for what seemed like hours----each one holding onto the other. Bracing themselves against the truth of the situation, the cold hard reality that they would never see him again. Meredith finally pulled herself out of Mark’s arms and sat straight up. “I’m okay…I just need…. a little more time…. for this to…(Meredith inhaled sharply)…I need to be alone.” Mark swallowed his own grief for her sake and replied, “sure thing, gorgeous…...Addison and I…we’ll go.” Meredith sat, staring blankly ahead, willing this reality to be just a dream---her very worst nightmare. Mark and Addison left Meredith alone to pull herself together just as she had wanted. As they immerged into the busy hallway, all eyes fell upon them. No one stopped performing their jobs, they just needed some kind of quick acknowledgement that their friend and colleague was alive and breathing---that she wasn’t just a crumpled shell of a person clinging to a cold hard locker room floor. Mark locked eyes with George and then Dr. Webber. He nodded his head to them as a sign that she would indeed appear from her self imposed prison. Dr. Webber took in a cleansing breath---almost willing her to leave the confines of that room at that very painful moment. Dr. Bailey shifted out from behind Dr. Webber and approached them both. “Addison,…you okay?” Bailey asked. Addison shuddered a reply, “yes….no….” She then she simply wiped one rogue tear from her cheek. “None of this makes any sense, but you’ll survive…we’ll all get through it.” It was a feeble attempt at encouragement, but even Miranda failed to convince herself. Addison whispered, “tell that to Dr. Grey…..and his family…..(realization dawned on her)… Oh God, Mark….(Addison whimpered) …. Derek’s family.” Bailey then interjected a quiet, “Oh Lord.” Mark began to rub his brow realizing the obvious and crushing oversight. “Dr. Sloane?” Izzie stepped forward. “Yes, Dr. Stevens.” “Is she okay…Meredith…she’s strong but….she really loved him….(Glancing at Addison then quickly back at Mark) I mean she fought like hell not to….but she really loved him….and they were…they were happy…I’m sorry Dr. Montgomery…its just she’s my friend and they….they were really happy together….” Dr. Yang decided she had waited long enough. “Look, I need to go in there…Meredith is my…” “Dr. Yang,” Mark replied, “ give her time….she just wants a little more time.” “Like you’d know what she wants or needs” “Dr. Yang, that was uncalled for….Mark was Derek’s best friend!” Addison retorted. “Yeah right…the best friend who banged Derek’s wife in his own bed….and what is it with you and your misty eyes…you came here and blew her life to hell…you played on your husbands guilt…. but…. you never once gave him the whole story, did you?….now you’re gonna stand here and attempt to be all protective of the woman he loved like you know her…like you can relate to her pain!?” Addison’s anger exploded, “ He was my husband for eleven years, Dr. Yang!” “Emphasis on was, Dr. Montgomery…he was your husband….now move out of my way!” Cristina pushed through the wall of Sloane/Montgomery and entered the attending locker room. She found Meredith sitting on the bench, wiping her wet cheeks with the back of her hands, Derek’s sweater now worn securely over her scrubs. She looked up and found comfort in Cristina---her friend, essentially her sister. Mer’s eyes rimmed with fresh tears as Cristina walked over to her and sat down without saying a word. Meredith simply rested her head on Dr. Yang’s shoulder. “I’m gonna have to peel that off of your sorry ass now aren’t I.” Cristina said it more like a sarcastic statement rather than a question. “yeah..” Meredith whispered. “”hmm…that’s what I thought.” Meredith sighed. “what?” Cristina quietly asked. A painful whimper escaped Meredith’s throat, “…I didn’t tell him (she began to cry again)….I never told him.” “never told him what, Mer.” Meredith shuddered, “… I love him….that I never stopped….he died today (her grief threatened to overtake her body as she began to tremble--- attempting to speak through uncontrollable sobs)…he died today…. and…and…… he didn’t know.” Cristina wrapped her arms tightly around her shoulders and quietly said. “he knew Meredith…I promise you…..he knew.”


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